MORNINGS

these days, mornings are slow and usually quiet. sometimes they start at 9am. sometimes grace sleeps till 8:30 and cuddles with me for another half hour before we even contemplate leaving the coziness of our bed. ale’s schedule changes every day and most of the time he’s gone before we decide to open our eyes. on days he goes in to work late, he’ll join us for our morning cuddles. no two days are the same.  there’s no consistency and i’m ok with it.

i’m ok with the pace of life these days. there’s no rush. we take our time, walk our doggy, drink coffee and maybe we’ll have breakfast by 10:30. sometimes we watch mickey and eat cereal on the floor. if we’re up to it, we’ll cook up a healthy organic feast complete with eggs, bacon and pancakes! there’s no difference between a weekday or a weekend and nap times are mandatory for gracie and this momma.

it hasn’t always been this way. before grace was born, i took pride in my morning routines. i was an advocate for rising before the sun and did not allow myself to sleep past 7am on a weekend. i was healthy, disciplined, up at 4:50am and at the gym by 5am. i would accomplish half of my to-do’s before 8am and i was proud of my productivity.

having a baby during nursing school changes you and makes you re-evaluate your priorities. everything that i knew to be true about mornings lost it’s value and no longer held the same weight as before. i spent the first 2 years of gracie’s life balancing a medical surgical book on one hand and a crying baby on the other. there were no such things as mornings and evenings… it was just one big mesh of time.  i was either awake or falling asleep.  i would study during feeding time and face-time her between classes holding back tears. it changed me.

sometimes i think about pulling up my bootstraps and making the effort to be at the gym before 6am, but then i remember that soon things will change for us. our baby will be here in a matter of weeks and then the nights will mesh into days and sleep will be a distant memory. maybe one day circumstances will change and i’ll take pride in getting everything done before lunch time. maybe.

for now, we’re soaking in our slow mornings. we’re walking more, catching butterflies, watering our plants and rearranging our furniture. we have dance parties, watch sunsets and take each other in because we know that this time we’re given is a short one.

so, what are your mornings like?  are you a disciplined 5am gym person or are you currently going through a slower season?

whatever the case, here’s to mornings and to all the one-legged-pj-wearing little girls!